


Slow Down, Crazy Child

by bisexualgambit



Category: Alpha Flight, X-Men (Comicverse), Young Avengers
Genre: Homophobia, Implied Gun Violence (no gun is fired but it’s used), Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Neglect, M/M, canned chili consumption
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-06
Updated: 2020-08-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:21:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25744252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bisexualgambit/pseuds/bisexualgambit
Summary: When Tommy gets away for the weekend, he ends up meeting one of his heroes in a surprising way.
Relationships: Jean-Paul Beaubier/Kyle Jinadu, Tommy Shepherd/David Alleyne
Comments: 4
Kudos: 33





	Slow Down, Crazy Child

After a long week at the office, Tommy Shepherd was dying for the chance to stretch his legs. It wasn’t unusual for him to want to get away for the weekend, however, not everyone could get away nearly as well as Tommy could.   
He could nearly feel his legs pulsating as he tried his best to not break into a dead sprint the minute his shift was over. He took each painfully slow step, as he exited the office, feeling his muscles stretched and tight like a rubber band. He knew in a few minutes he would be free, to let the rubber band snap, to release the tension; but each step still felt like torture. If he ran he’d get into trouble though, and he knew in the end running wasn’t worth his job. He wondered if it’d be different, if people knew the agony of living in a snail’s world.  
But snails never get it.  
Tommy opens the doors to the outside, breathing in the not-fresh air of the city: Freedom at last. The rubber band snaps back, and all Tommy can feel is the rushing of wind past him. There is no tension in his body for once. When he’s at a snail's pace, he trips over himself, when he’s at a snail’s pace, he thinks he may actually be as messy as everyone says he is. But when he can run like this? He is calm, focused, for once, his body is in perfect harmony with itself.   
Tommy runs for hours, burning off the feeling that came from a week without any missions or reasons to run. He runs until it gets too dark to see where he’s going, and he realizes it’s going to be tough to get back to his apartment without running into a couple trees. Also, he’d told David he was going to be out of town all weekend, and if he went back to his apartment, he’d have to admit to David that he’d been avoiding him.   
He decides to find a place to stay for the night, knowing he’s up north and usually up north he can find an abandoned hunting cabin or yurt for the night if he just looks hard enough. Tonight he’s lucky, he only has to look for 20 minutes before he finds a cabin that isn’t occupied.   
It’s bigger than most of the cabins he finds up north, having two rooms instead of the usual one room, it’s also much more maintained than most (clearly not abandoned) but still there are no lights on, and upon entering the cabin, Tommy finds a comforting layer of dust on everything.  
A winter cabin, Tommy thinks to himself, satisfied with his find. He flops down on the couch, covering himself with a blanket he took off of a stack behind a chair and dozing off.  
He sleeps soundly for being in an unfamiliar setting with no defense against attack. Juvie knocked that instinct out of him… the only way he could sleep was accepting that he wasn’t going to feel safe when he did. Usually it didn’t hurt Tommy, in fact it was pretty useful to be able to sleep any time anywhere. Except for when you are awoken by the sound of a gun cocking.  
Tommy sits straight up, looking wildly around the room, searching the dark for the sound, his eyes just barely able to make out a looming figure standing about three feet away.  
“qui êtes vous et que fais-tu dans ma cabine?” The figure snarls at Tommy. Tommy rubs his eyes, trying to figure out if maybe he’s still asleep and having a very strange nightmare.   
“Uh… what?”   
“I said,” the man growled slower, suddenly the room started to fill with a glowing light that grew brighter, and seemed to be coming from the man who spoke “who are you and why are you in my house?” Tommy jumped up and began backing away from the figure.  
In the new light, Tommy could make out the figure of the man standing before him. He was holding a hunting rifle (though it was not pointed at Tommy, thankfully) and stood in a defensive stance, his face menacing in the low light, though.. Tommy thought… It was a face he recognized.   
“Holy Shit!” He said, laughing about the strange twist of fate “you’re Jean-Paul Beaubier!”   
“Damn it! I ask who you are not who I am!” He shouted, taking a step towards Tommy, raising the barrel slightly above his waist. Tommy took a step back, throwing his hands up.   
“I’m- Im Tommy Shepherd! I was just crashing here for the night and then leaving in the morning! I’m from-“ the Young Avengers? The House of Magnus? “-From New Jersey!”   
“Oh.” Jean-Paul said, standing much less defensively “Well what the hell are you doing out here in the middle of the Quebec wilderness?”   
“I was going for a run… ended up here.” He sighed, with both parties seeming much more calm.   
“The nearest town is 15 kilometers away… thats one hell of a run.”  
“15 kilometers? Psh! That’s chump change! I ran 1500 miles today!” He scoffed, folding his arms.   
“Wait a moment…” Jean-Paul said quietly, lowering his gun even more, he took a step towards Tommy and turned up the light on his powers, squinting at him. “You're that boy from the young avengers aren’t you?” He said, a smile forming on his face. “Speed, non?”   
“Yeah” Tommy said, breathing a sigh of relief. The older speedster let out a low chuckle and set the gun down on the coffee table.   
“What are the odds.” He said, shaking his head, chuckling again. He stuck out his hand “well, Jean-Paul Beaubier, Northstar. I guess we were bound to meet eventually, eh?” He sighed, and Tommy let out a small, high pitched chuckle, the only sound he could muster, as he shook the man’s hand.  
It felt ridiculous, all those years Tommy had made fun of Billy for fanboying whenever they met a hero, and not her he was facing a living legend with sweaty palms and no idea what to say.   
He had to admit it wasn’t like he was a fan of Northstar’s the way Billy was a fan of every Avenger ever. For him the admiration had developed after his powers and after juvie. He’d been compared power wise to Northstar while he was locked up, but on the outside, he’d learned about Jean-Paul Beaubier. His book had been on Teddy’s desk so Tommy had read it while he waited for Teddy to get home one day and it had struck a chord with Tommy. Snail didn't get it, and he thought, even if he never met the speedster, somehow he got it. Even the crap that had nothing to do with powers. A violent adolescence? A troubled past with the law? The shock of realizing you have a twin and that you can break the sound barrier? Tommy felt like he could have written the book and it was nice to know someone else out there got it. He hadn't understood why Northstar’s book had been so affirming for his existence when he had a relationship with his Uncle Pietro, who understood Tommy’s exact power. But maybe the recent development that Tommy had feelings for David may explain some of it. By the time Tommy could reconnect his tongue to his brain, Northstar began to putter around the cabin, turning a light and looking in the cabinets.   
“I’m starving, are you hungry?” He asked, examining what looked like a can of chili.   
“So… you're not mad I broke in here anymore?” Tommy asked, still confused. Northstar shrugged, as if a minute ago he hadn’t been wielding a rifle at him.   
“Oh I don’t care about squatters, I care about getting ambushed. If I made chili would you want some?” Tommy just stared at him for a second. Northstar looked at him, knitting his eyebrows together. “What?”   
“I just… I don’t know… I didn’t expect you to be so… friendly.” Tommy shrugged, and Northstar chuckled, and shrugged in return before returning to cooking chili on the stove.  
“I don’t know, perhaps I’ve got a soft spot for my fellow speed demons.” To which Tommy wasn’t able to contain his laugh. Northstar turned to him, a confused look on his face.  
“You know that would include my Uncle Pietro then?” Tommy said, Northstar scrounged his nose up at the thought.   
“Good point, we don’t want anyone getting the idea that I like your uncle… Maybe I’m just getting tired of unnecessary fighting.” He sighed. In the following silence, Tommy watched Jean-Paul stirred the chili, his own stomach growling loudly.   
“Hey wait a second, what are you doing here?” Tommy asked.  
“I own this place, I can come here whenever I want.”   
“Yeah but… why? Don’t you have a husband? Where is he?”  
“At home.” The words were spat out like poison, and Tommy nodded, no stranger to what was happening.  
“You guys got into a fight?” He asked, Jean-Paul turned to him, and from the look on his face, Tommy might have spoken too soon on that “friendly” thing.   
“Look, I don’t care if you’re squatting here but if you expect me to talk about my marriage with a complete stranger then you’re even stupider than your uncle.” He scoffed, and Tommy nodded.  
“Understood… but… that’s why you’re up here right?” Jean-Paul laughed a bitter, empty laugh,and then fell silent a moment, “it’s why I’m up here.” He mumbled. Jean-Paul turned to look at Tommy, a melancholy and understanding expression. The pair fell silent, Jean-Paul quietly cooking until he seemed satisfied with the temperature of the chili, getting out two bowls.   
“venez. Asseoir.” he said, motioning to the table in the kitchen. Tommy didn’t speak French, but he could interpret the context clues, striding across the room and slumping down in the chair across from Jean-Paul, who handed him a bowl of chili.   
“Thanks.” Tommy sighed, digging into the chili. They were silent for a while, until finally Jean-Paul let out a loud sigh and sat back, dropping his spoon dramatically.  
“Are you going to sit there acting like a kicked puppy all night?”  
“Oh so you don’t have to talk about what’s bothering you… just me?” Tommy scoffed. A small smirk toyed on Jean-Paul’s face.   
“Fair enough.” He chuckled, taking a spoonful of chili and returning to eating silently.   
“What if we did talk about what was bothering us though?” Tommy said, almost under his breath  
“Pardon?”  
“Yeah I mean… what if we did tell each other what was bothering us? No judgement, we don’t know just others just… get it off our chest and forget about it?” Tommy proposed. Jean-Paul looked at him for a long moment, twirling his spoon in his hand and starring Tommy down before letting out a huff of air and nodding   
“You know what? Why not?” He leaned back in his chair, folding his arms across his chest “you first”  
“Huh?”  
“Well, it was your idea… go on, tell me all about your feelings.” He said, a slight chuckle. Tommy swallowed hard, his nerves returning.   
“Nothing leaves this table right?” He asked, scratching his neck  
“Of course.” Tommy nodded, and let out a deep sigh, knowing the only way he was going to be able to get through talking about his feelings: steamroll right through it.  
“My boyfriend wants to go public… he hasn’t said as much but he keeps talking about wanting to go on a double date or meeting his friends or holding hands when we go out, and I know I can’t expect him to wait forever but I like that nobody else knows about us yet, you know? I don’t want to deal with Billy being an asshole about me dating David, or dating a guy at all… it’s just…. I like our little bubble and I just want to hold on to it for a little while longer but I can tell David’s getting annoyed with it.” He gushed, when he finished he put his head in his hands, letting out a groan in frustration   
“Well that was certainly… a lot.” Northstar said, though his face didn’t seem to indict much surprise. “So how long have you and this David been together?”  
“Well… we went on our first date a year and a half ago I think… In my defense though there was a like six month time period where I was kidnapped by an interdimensional parasite demon so it doesn’t count!” Jean-Paul pinched the bridge of his nose, and shook his head.  
“Well, interdimensional parasite aside, how long have you guys been together-together?”   
“Well… I guess it’s been six months now since I first called him my boyfriend.”   
“Let me guess- your still in the closet, aren’t you?” Northstar said, Tommy’s grip on his spoon tightened   
“Not everyone needs to make a big deal about their sexuality.” He scoffed, and Northstar smirked again.   
“You sound like someone I used to know.” He chuckled, his eyes in a long past memory of someone Tommy didn’t know, “no judgement for being in the closet! There is absolutely no shame in it and while I agree, your sexuality is entirely your business- But if I can offer you some unsolicited advice, from someone who has been in your shoes before?” Tommy nodded rapidly, and Jean-Paul smiled.   
“You know that feeling when you aren’t able to run, really really run, for a long time? That tight muscle ache, of feeling like ‘if I could sprint it out for five minutes then maybe my skin wouldn’t feel so tight?’” Tommy nodded, it’s the very reason he was sitting here now.  
“Your David is probably feeling some of that right now. Six months, and nobody knows about your relationship? That’s a long time to not be able to stretch your legs.”   
“I didn’t… I didn’t think about that.” Tommy said quietly, “we started dating right after he came out too.” He sighed, putting his head in his hands again. “Oh God, I put him right back into the closet, didn’t I?”  
“No… you didn’t put him back in the closet, Tommy, but I think it’s also easy to mistake safety for stability.”   
“I don’t know what-“  
“Look, Tommy, You don’t ave to come out or leave your bubble, but you do have to talk to him about this… and maybe you should ask yourself why your really scared to meet his friends.”   
“What do you mean?”  
“Well… is it really fun? Living in your…. bubble?” He asked, leaning on the table and looking Tommy in the eyes, “do you really enjoy spending all your time with David inside or where nobody knows who you are? Or is it just that safer? I mean how can something that nobody knows about be destroyed?” Tommy scrounge up his nose, and pushed the bowl away from him.   
“Stop trying to act like you know me!” He scoffed, folding his arms and leaning back in his chair. Northstar let out a hard laugh and Tommy gave him a look,   
“Man, if I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were MY nephew,” he said shaking his head, “damn… maybe Bobby was onto something when he said all speedsters are the same.” He smiled, Tommy shook his head and stared at the floor, and Northstar sighed again.   
“I have this recurring nightmare where everything starts normal… I’m always with Kyle, on a date or hanging out on the couch watching a movie. It’s never anything exciting or necessarily significant, but every time, my foster dad will burst through the door and start beating me for being a limp wrist.” He says, “Tommy I want to tell you: I’ve been out for years… decades now, and not once has my foster dad come through my door and beat me, no matter how convinced my brain is of that.”  
“Why are you telling me this?”  
“Cause I think you're like me and you aren’t… used to stability. So when it happens it can either feel claustrophobic or it can feel….” he snapped his fingers, searching for the word  
“-Fleeting.” Tommy nodded, suddenly connecting the dots for himself.   
“Exactly.” How long had he been waiting for someone to take this life away from him? He hadn’t realized it, but a part of him had been waiting, for what he wasn’t sure. Maybe it was Frank to come and tell him to man up before he made him, or Mary’s to cry about why her sweet little boy had been replaced by some gay mutant menace. Maybe he was waiting for the doctors and guards from juvie to come and lock him back up and start their experiences again.  
Maybe he was waiting for David to realize he was too good for Tommy.   
“So what your saying is, Me and David should go public?”   
“No… I wish someone had given me this advice so, take it slow when you do decide to come out or go public or whatever you decide to do. But maybe that starts with meeting your David’s friends.”  
“I am dying to meet this Josh guy he always talks about.” Tommy chuckled, admittedly… it felt really good to talk about David with someone who wasn’t David. Maybe he’d tell Kate or someone, so he could talk more about him. Maybe if he could get Teddy to promise not to tell Billy yet-  
“Wait a second… Josh…” Jean-Paul said, knitting his eyebrows together, “Tommy what is David’s last name?”  
“Uh… Alleyne?” He said, he watched Northstar’s eyes get wide and his mouth hung agape. After a couple seconds the X-Man started to laugh, a full bellied laugh.   
“Here I was… this whole time thinking it was some random guy… you’re dating David?!” He laughed again, barely able to finish his sentence, and Tommy half kicked himself for forgetting that of course David and Northstar would know each other. “I should have put two and two together.” He smiled, “tu es certainement son type” he murmured under his breath.  
“What was that?”  
“Tell me does he still think the Chicago Blackhawks are good?”  
“Oh he’s fully convinced they’re in the running for the Stanley Cup this season.” And now both of them were laughing. Once there laughter had died down, Jean-Paul looked at Tommy and then to his bowl,  
“Get enough to eat?”  
“Uhh.. yeah,” Tommy said, feeling the heft of the chili in his stomach.   
“Bein.” He said, taking his dish from him, and putting them in a bucket that Tommy assumes is supposed to be the sink.   
“So what were you fighting with Kyle about?” Tommy asks, leaning on the table. Jean-Paul let out a heavy sigh,  
“Oh right- my turn…” he sat back down and sighed again, looking at Tommy “while, like I said earlier, stability can feel a little claustrophobic sometimes.”  
“That isn’t an answer!” Tommy scoffed, “come on! I laid my entire soul out for you! My own twin brother doesn’t even know I’m bi!”   
“He wants kids.” Jean-Paul said, his face going grey.   
“Oh…” Tommy said.  
“And I-I want kids too, but he wants them like… now, and it’s been alright for a couple years but now his mom is dropping hints asking when she’s going to become a grandma and his sister made a comment about how all she wants for Christmas this year is to be an aunt and it’s like, I’m not ready to give up being an X-Men yet, and this life is no life for a child to be raised in. What if something happens to me, or Kyle, or god forbid our children?”  
“Well what did Kyle say?”  
“He said he was willing to wait to have kids, but he asked me how long he should wait.”  
“Oh damn… and what did you say.”  
“I… I said I don’t know… and then he gave me that LOOK and I asked if he was mad at me… he said he didn’t know.”  
“Oof… Thats rough dude.” Tommy said, “but can I give you some unsolicited advice, in exchange for the advice you gave me?”  
“I don’t know how you could possibly help me,”  
“Well, I can’t hurt… also I’m a superhero kid, remember? And I was raised by civilians! So I know both sides of the coin and let me say: the fact that you're worried this much about a hypothetical child? You’ve already secured your Parent-Of-The-Year Award as far as I’m concerned.” The older speedster gave Tommy a look that urged him to continue talking “I’ve had two sets of parents, my civilian parents, Mary and Frank? They just had me because they thought it was what they were supposed to do. But now I have my superhero family… Am I in more danger? Sure, maybe. But I also know that these are people who love me, and, I don’t know: I think it’s corny, but all you need to do is love your kid.”  
“Yeah… but what if I still fuck them up somehow.”  
“Oh, you absolutely will. Everybody is a little fucked up by their parents, even the most well-meaning parents fuck up their kids. I’m sure your parents fucked you up.”  
“My parents died when I was an infant.”  
“And did that not fuck you up?”  
“Bon d’accord.” Northstar nodded  
“For what it’s worth, I know I’m a complete stranger but I’d think you’d make a great dad.” Tommy said, Northstar looked at the floor  
“Thanks,” he said, quietly, contemplating what Tommy had just said.   
“Hey you know what I just realized,” Tommy laughed,   
“What?”  
“Here we are, a couple of speedsters, hiding out in a cabin because our partners are moving too fast for us.” He said, and Jean-Paul laughed too, shaking his head.   
“You’re right though,” he said with a sigh, he striding towards the door, picking up the backpack that was next to it that Tommy hadn’t noticed   
“Hey, where are you going?” Tommy asked, Jean-Paul turned back to him and smiled  
“Home, to my husband. Feel free to stay as long as you like, just make sure you take any trash with you.” He stepped out on the porch, preparing to take off, he stopped at the last second and turned to Tommy again   
“Thank you for talking sense into me, Tommy.”  
“You’re welcome… thanks for doing the same for me, Northstar.”  
“Please… my friends call me JP.”   
“Okay… JP… see you around, JP.” Tommy chuckled, nervously. Jean-Paul shook his head, chuckling once more before launching himself into the night sky, disappearing as a streak of light against the Milky Way.   
Tommy watched where he’d left until the light faded from the sky.   
——  
David Alleyne wasn’t a deep sleeper, years of sleeping in a school that was always under attack made it hard to trust the safety of his surroundings, so when he heard his bedroom door open, and someone slip in he was quick to he feet, taking the knife off his bed stand   
“Who’s there?!” He shouted, wielding his knife at the figure in the doorway   
“Geez! If people could stop threatening me with weapons, that would be great!”   
“Tommy?” David asked, fumbling to put on his glasses  
“In the flesh.”  
“I thought you said you were out of town this weekend?”  
“I was… but then I thought about it and, care if I crash your dinner with your friends from school tomorrow? as your boyfriend?” He asked, watching a smile slowly wash over David’s face. Tommy’s heart fluttered a bit, at just how much his smile seemed to brighten the near pitch black room  
“Not at all, in fact… I’d like that very much.” He said, “what I’d like even more right now though, is for you to come be the little spoon.” He smiled, and Tommy was more than happy to take that request, crawling into bed and relaxing into David’s arms.   
“Oh,” Tommy said, “I should probably warn you: I did eat some canned chili and I don’t think it’s quite agreeing with me.”  
“.... maybe you should be big spoon then.”

**Author's Note:**

> Man quarantine has me pumping out fanfiction lol... this entire thing was inspired by A- wanting all my speedsters to be friends and B- listening to Vienna by Billy Joel on repeat for an hour. 
> 
> Also I apologize for my poorly translated French- it’s been a few years since I took it... and I wasn’t very good when I was taking it anyways.


End file.
